I used to do that too

Hi there.  Lumpkins is sleeping.  Double yay.  Almost all of me wants to be sleeping too.  But I've decided to write to you instead.  You can thank me later.  Or buy me coffee...after November.

That's right, many of you saw my declaration of No Drink November.  And I'm sticking to it.  I drink water, my shakes, coffee from home (I'm not a saint people) and an occasional Zevia...which Husband R says I should give up too.

What prompted this moment of insanity?  Exhaustion and belly fat that WILL NOT go away.  Those women who drop like 800 lbs while nursing...I am not them.  I'm pretty convinced my body is like ooh fat...lets make more fat and more fat and more fat. Have you seen Lumpkins lately?  Welp. Yeah.  In an effort to stick it to the fat, I gave up alcohol and Starbucks...Shut The Full Cup!  (Saw that on a facebook page, oh the hilarity)

But let's get to the real reason we're here.  Thanks to social media, its no secret at all that I've found a passion for helping others get healthy.  I love it like I used to love ALL the drinks.  And I've been checking into bootcamp online as well.  I'm sure you've seen it.  Just so you know, each check in gives towards a charity.  That's why I do it like every.single.day.  Not to make you feel bad, but to feed the kids or provide a coat or pay for health screenings.  But now I'm like a celebrity.  Or not really a celebrity, maybe just a person who other people see and think oh, she knows a thing or two. Or maybe just she knows a little something.  Whatever.  People ask me questions.

And the number one question I get, comes from moms.  Tired moms. Busy moms. Moms who are trying to make this whole exercise, health, not wanting to nap all the time thing work. They'll say.."Geez, I just don't have time to get to the gym, I mean I know its good for me and I really want to go but I'm just so tired. What am I supposed to do?"

So here's the thing.  I have exercised since I was like 2.  Thanks mom and dad.

No but really, I've been playing sports as long as I can remember.  And once I got out of high school I took up running.  And I would run and run and then eat and eat.  I specifically remember a time, after I got married, but before Kindergarten A was on the planet, that I was doing some pretty hard core training.  And the trainer would always talk about these nutrition seminars and I never went.  I worked out and ran so I could eat whatever I wanted.  I'm burning a billion calories a day...truthfully probably 400 or so...I'll eat that pizza and ice cream if I want to.  Even now I have a shirt that says "I run because I really like food."  It's still sorta true for me but it's what's wrong with most of us.

Have you ever noticed people who work out all the time but their body composition never changes?  They don't lose inches or lbs and muscle definition seems to be elusive.  It's because they are trying to out run, out train their fork.  And I know because I was that person.

Tired, busy mom. Here's my answer.  Always, always, always make nutrition your # 1 priority.  I'm going to yell in case you missed that.

MAKE NUTRITION YOUR NUMERO UNO! (number one...if you don't speak spanish)

Exercise is good for you, it is.  It's good for your heart and releases endorphins and I try to go at least 5 times a week.  But if you can't.  If you literally have zero time.  It's okay. I mean I've never heard the saying...let exercise by thy medicine.  Focus on what you're putting in your body.  Change the way you are eating...and drinking...ahem.   85% of your results come from your nutrition.

What does this look like?  It looks like 6 small meals a day.  It looks like food prep on Sunday so that you can stick to it all week.  It looks like a gallon of water.  It looks like less sweets and more vegetables.  I promise if you do these things, you wont be as tired.  And you won't be as sluggish.  And if you do happen to make it to the gym, you'll actually benefit from the workout.

I cannot tell you enough how many times someone told me that and I ignored it.  I like food. Like a lot.  And I like food prep like....hard pass.   But for the past 2 years I've been living it.  And just this last year I've really been sticking to it.  Pregnancy and all.

And because food prep is like my favorite thing in the whole entire world...said no one ever...I have super easy ways to get my nutrition in.  My days go a little like this.  Protein bar with my coffee.  Shake for snack.  Green food for lunch (think salad). Eggs or oatmeal or almonds for snack.  Yummy dinner made even more yummy when Husband R makes it.  And a bedtime belly buster as my night cap.  And water thrown all up in there.  My food prep went from prepping all my meals to prepping...well 1.  Because we usually cook dinner fresh every night.  We can talk about the importance of the products you choose to use later.

Have more questions? Ask away.  I want you to know it really is possible to feel good and have energy. It's not just something I made up.  And I can even help you do it.

Capiche?  (That's Italian for "understand?"...I'm full of bilingualisms today...and made up words)

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#YouAreEnough

I just dropped, literally dropped my mop to write you this.  And when I pause myself when I'm in that mode...you know it's gotta be good.  This is something, as women, that we need to know.  Deep down.  We need to hear it, learn it, remember it.  And if you're a man reading this, know this about the women in your life, your daughters, your wives, your sisters and your mom.  They need you to know this too.

I'm fat. I'm out of shape.  I don't look like her.  I'm always running behind.  I have nothing to give.  I'm not great at anything.  I fail as a mother daily.  I neglect my husband too often.  My house isn't perfect.  I will never be enough.

Ever said these things to yourself?

Yeah, me too.

But here's what I'm learning.

Mamas, you know how we feel about our children when they're doing something good.  When they accomplish something for the first time?  When they sing a song, or write their name, when they roll over or take their first steps?  When they're kind to a friend, or respectful to an adult?   That undeniable sense of pride.  That thought of, "wow, you're so smart, beautiful, fast, strong, kind, perfect!"

Our Father sees us in that very same light.  He looks at us and delights in his creation. 

He delights in YOU.

He says, "You are so smart, so beautiful.  You are kind, fast and strong.  You are mine and I am proud."

Read that again.  Go ahead. I'll wait.

Those things we tell ourselves, those little voices we hear, repeating over and over that we're not enough...they aren't from our creator.

If we could intentionally tell ourselves that everyday, better yet, if we could intentionally tell each other, tell our children that truth, oh what would that do?  If our husbands, our dads, our brothers intentionally spoke the truth into us.  How things would be different...how different would we feel?

But let's move into reality, my reality.

I've survived six whole weeks. As a mother of two girls. How does that happen? Six weeks gone so fast? Kindergarten A is actually in kindergarten and I have to get her to school at the rude hour of 8am.  Who can get out of the house that early? And baby C, who I've renamed Lumpkins...she's doing a fantastic job being a baby. But mama? I'm just surviving.

I have on a shirt. I also had on this shirt yesterday. And I know for a fact in the middle of the night Lumpkins spit up all over me. Did I change my shirt?  It was 4 AM in the morning. Nobody's got time to change clothes at that hour. Plus I used our sheets to wipe it off.  I met my coworker for my first day back at work in this shirt. Hey, we at least met at my house. I also left my doctors appointment wearing this shirt. Surviving I tell you.  At least it's a cute shirt.

I got to see Liz at that appointment. She's the midwife we all get to thank for not letting Lumpkins hit the bathroom floor. She says, "You look great! You've lost 16 or 17 pounds" But as I stepped off the scale I cringed. My goal was to be at my pre-baby weight by six weeks postpartum. And I still have 10 pounds to lose.

I'm not enough.

Everyday, I look at my stomach.  The one that carried life.  I look at my body.  The one that brought two beautiful girls into the world.  And I shudder. 

And I pray for that thought to be taken from me. And to be replaced.  To be erased.  For the truth to be louder than a whisper and the lie to be overcome.

"You created the deepest parts of my being.
    You put me together inside my mother’s body. 
 How you made me is amazing and wonderful.
    I praise you for that.
What you have done is wonderful.
    I know that very well."

And

"You planned how many days I would live.
    You wrote down the number of them in your book
    before I had lived through even one of them.

God, your thoughts about me are priceless.
    No one can possibly add them all up. 

 If I could count them,
    they would be more than the grains of sand.
If I were to fall asleep counting and then wake up,
    you would still be there with me."

*Psalm 139

Amazing. Wonderful. Priceless.

Those are His words. About us.

I want to know that.  Remember it. Truly hear it.

And don't read this wrong.  This doesn't give us an excuse to not try.  To not strive to be better. 

But when you haven't showered and have spit up on your shirt.  Or are late again for the eight hundredth time.  Or look in the mirror and don't like what you see.   

It just gives us permission to give ourselves grace.  To take one day at a time.  To take a step forward, to make progress, imperfect progress.

Because I am enough.  And so are you.  

Tell somebody that today.  #YouAreEnough

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Baby C's birth story

Georgia woman has 8lb baby in hospital bathroom.

Where's the go pro when you need it? I have a sneaking suspicion we would've broken the Internet by now.

If you're thinking this is one of the craziest birth stories you've ever heard from someone you know, I'm sure you're right.  It's definitely on the top of my list for one of the craziest things that's ever happened to me. But actually, besides the toilet paper in the background, Baby C's birth went exactly as I had hoped.

I wanted a natural birth.  I spent hours upon hours reading about relaxation and pain coping techniques. We hired a doula and took a confident childbirth class.   I downloaded worship music and scriptures to my phone.  Husband R bought LED candles and portable speakers. He packed protein bars, chia squeeze snacks and replenish (a natural electrolyte drink) to keep me hydrated. We stocked up on essential oils and packed the diffuser.  I practiced, breathing and relaxing and focusing on positive things. We were ready to turn that hospital room into a magical cave, a place where a mama in labor could peacefully bring her child into the world. I told my midwives that I didn't want an IV or pain meds.  I really just wanted to be left alone except for my husband and my doula.  It's all about trusting my body and not being afraid of the process.  God designed me to give birth.  It's not something I should fear.  I was ready to do my thing.

Our bags were packed at 38 weeks.  And then we waited.  Week 39. Week 40.  I decided to the let the midwife check and I was 3.5 cm dilated and 70% effaced.  Surely she'll be here in a day or so.  Then week 41.  What IS she doing in there?   I asked lots of you to pray that she would come soon because I did not want to be induced.  Many of you told me you were praying for an easy and smooth delivery.  Some of you must have been praying it would be quick too!

On Wednesday, at 41 weeks and 3 days, I decided to drink castor oil.  It's a laxative and because of  the stimulation it can also start contractions.  I had talked to my doula and several friends and on their advice took 1 TBSP mixed with 4 oz of orange juice.  This was at 4:30pm.  I went outside to weed the flower beds..because what else could I possibly do at a time like this. I planned to drink another tablespoon the next morning if nothing happened.

Something happened.

At 3am I woke up with very mild contractions.  I honestly thought they were still Braxton Hicks.  I got out of bed and walked around for a bit, they didn't stop so I decided to go back to bed and try to get some rest.  If this was the real thing, I didn't want to go into it tired.

At 4am my water broke..  I actually heard it.  It sounded like a balloon popping. Weird...yes.  I woke up Husband R and told him he needed to start getting the car packed.   FYI, when your water breaks your body keeps making fluid, so trying to do anything after your water breaks, without making a mess, is nearly impossible.  But I still managed to go downstairs, eat a protein bar, drink a cup of coffee and unload the dishwasher.  You know, all the important things.   I called my doula and updated her, she advised me to get in a warm bath and relax and to call her back when I needed her.  I was in the bathtub for about 15 minutes until I couldn't handle not moving through the contractions.  I got out and moved to the bed.  At this point my contractions were about 5 minutes apart, but only lasting 30-45 seconds.  I have an app on my phone that was timing my contractions and  I was handling them.

By 6:30am I could no longer talk through a contraction, only breath and sit on my ball. Husband R was still running around the house gathering everything and packing the car.  I called my mom to tell her to head our way, she lives in WV so I wanted her to be the first to know so that she could get to us as soon as possible. I had two contractions while on the phone with her.  She told me to go to the hospital.  I told her I was doing okay.

Husband R took Kindergartner A over to the neighbor and called the doula and told her my contractions were getting more painful and closer together but not lasting that long.   But looking back at the timer on my phone, by this point they were coming every 3-4 minutes and lasting 45-50 seconds.  We probably should have left at this time, but while it was painful, I was still breathing through them.

My doula is good at what she does, because at 7:15am Husband R called her to tell her we were leaving for the hospital and for her to meet us there.  But she was only 5 min away from our house.  We hadn't asked her to come yet, she just knew, because she's that good. When she arrived we headed to the car.  I had an incredibly painful contraction in the garage and was dreading the car ride.  None of us realized how far a long I actually was and we calculated that I would have about 4-5 contractions during the 30 minute drive.  I could get through that.

I climbed into the backseat so I could move around a bit. This was the longest most painful half hour I've ever experienced.  I had my headphones in and was trying to relax but that wasn't going to happen.  I couldn't tell when the contraction stopped and another started. What I actually ended up having in the car was 10 contractions, and the 11th coming as I was getting out at the hospital.  I was screaming at Husband R to help me and that I couldn't do it anymore.  I told him I was going to throw up, pass out, die.  So much for the peaceful, magical cave.  I wanted to rip the headrest off the front seat and was begging for relief.

Husband R told me he actually thought he was going to have to deliver the baby in the car.  I'm sure he breathed a sigh of relief when we pulled into the women & chlidren's pavilion drop off.   We arrived around 7:55am and he got me out of the car and my doula parked her car and came running. She later told me, as she was following us in her car, she could see my hair being puffed up as I was breathing.  She knew at that point I was getting close.

We walked into the waiting room and up to the front desk.  There were several people in the waiting room and they were all staring at me, because a women in active labor is so fun to watch.  I looked to my left and there were two dark bathrooms that looked like safe havens at the time.  I walked to the women's bathroom and my doula followed me. I really just wanted to get away from all the stares and focus on getting through the next contraction. Husband R continued to check us in.

I had another contraction in the bathroom and my doula told me to grab the sink and squat.  Although it hurt and I didn't want to, I squatted down and immediately had to go pee.  I got over to the toilet and pulled down my pants and let out a scream I never hope to hear come out of my mouth again.  The baby was crowning.  I got no pressure, no warning, she was just there.

My doula immediately told me to get on all fours on the floor. I was in another world at this point and vaguely remember what happened next, but thank God my doula was with me and was able to tell me what to do.  I heard Rob yell for a doctor and heard someone say they had cleared out the waiting room.  Because of all the chaos my contractions stopped so I was just there on my hands and knees waiting. I heard a ton of people come into the bathroom and then asked my doula what I was supposed to do now.  Like I had forgotten.  She told me to concentrate and bear down.  With two more pushes baby C entered the world at 8:04am.  I turned around to hold her and found 10 faces staring back at me, I remember thinking, where did all these people come from?  That and did I really just have a baby in the bathroom?  And then, I looked at my baby, healthy and pink and crying.

I never got to use my candles or my oils, eat my snacks or read my scriptures.  I never made it to my magical cave.  But I also didn't have to fight off an IV or any medical interventions.  I brought baby C into this world like I had hoped and prayed for.  Easily, quickly and when she was ready.   It was a bit traumatic and shocking it happened so fast but other than making it to a private room, I wouldn't change a thing.   We were able to leave in a little over 24 hours and recovery has been easy compared to Kindergartner A's birth.

Happy 1 week birthday baby C.  We love you and if life with you is anything like your arrival, we are in for one exciting, wild ride!

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Waiting on Baby

I'm still here. And I'm still pregnant.  A good friend texted me to say "You've been pregnant for roughly 11 years."

Not quite.  But for 288 days...I've been pregnant.  I'm starting to think I'm part elephant.

And all the things to induce labor safely and naturally have been tried.  

But there is still a full grown newborn baby inside of me.  Really. I saw her today.  Her cheeks are so chubby.  She's giving me kisses...and most likely has my nose.  And sort of looks like she's swallowed a hot dog.  Ultrasounds are weird that way.

Kindergartner A has all but given up on being a big sister.  It's like we've told her this horrible lie. Oh a baby is coming, you're going to be a big sister.  But she's not dumb.  There's no baby.  And she's not a sister yet.  I don't blame her for being less than excited at this point.

But at my midwife appointment today she asked me how I'm feeling.  And physically, I feel great.  I have a "normal" amount of energy, I'm sleeping well, not too swollen and overall pretty okay.  And before all the other pregnant women roll their eyes in disgust, my pregnancies aren't that easy.  I'm sick, like terribly, throw up several times a day sick for the first oh, 16-18 weeks.  I have had my fair share of discomfort.

But right now, at 41 weeks and 1 day I'm doing really well.  Exercise has played a part, nutrition has played a bigger part and prayer has played the biggest part. 

The midwife asks, "Who are YOU?  Most women by now are begging me to get this baby out!"

I don't think that well on my feet.  And really was a bit surprised by her question.  I just answered, "I don't mind waiting."    I should have answered so much differently.

I'm not anyone special. But the waiting thing.  I've done it.  And what I've had experience waiting for was no where near as rewarding as my sweet baby girl will be.

Just a little less than two years ago I found myself waiting for biopsy results, surgery results, PET scan results and genetic testing results  (read that here).  That's waiting.  And that's much harder.

This waiting, waiting on baby.  I can do.  She will come on her time, on God's time.  He has knit her together perfectly in his image.  And he has her birthday already planned.  I won't interfere with that.

Let me just say, ultimately, however babies arrive as long as mama and baby are healthy, it truly doesn't matter.  I have had close friends have home births, be induced,  have water births, have c sections, get epidurals and bring their babies into the world the way that worked best for them.  But for me, I've done the induction thing, unnecessarily, and it wasn't pleasant.  This time I'm choosing differently.  I'm doing what is best for me and for her. 

And that means giving her more time and my body more time and more waiting.

"Who are you?"  

I am at peace with God's timing and his plan.  I am a woman surrendered to faith.  That's who I am. And if she asks again, that's how I'll answer.

"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens: a time to be born..." Ecclesiastes 3

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How to say no to the summer slump

Is it the late..oh so late stage of pregnancy talking or am I the only one that feels like telling my kid to go play quietly in her room while I lay in bed until noon sipping multiple cups of coffee, snacks within in my reach, the A/C kicked up to high gear and the very dark black out curtains drawn tightly closed? 

It's summer.  I'm lucky I don't have an alarm clock to wake up to.  Unless you consider kindergarten A's warm breath and ever so gentle tap on the forehead at 6am an alarm clock.  At least she doesn't make annoying buzzer noises...yet. 

When the kid is out of school, I'm out of routine. And it's like I'm expected to be a super hero.  I mean who else could entertain a 5 year old all day every day for 3 months?  And the questions.  I have no idea why you can't take mommy's fingernails and put them on your hands (real question I got asked yesterday), other than that's weird and I don't want to think about it.

And I am NOT a pinterest-y  mom.  I tried once.  When A was still toddling A.  I was on my game.  There were noodles and sponges and glue and string and alphabet letters.  We made masterpieces for the ages...really just to mail to nana.  But that faded quickly when she started school and I saw what a real educational craft is supposed to look like.   I guess our lopsided popsicle stick half lady half goat thingy just isn't good enough.

So what are we to do, how are we supposed to cope?  Consider yourself lucky if you have a job.  Don't be jealous that I get to be at the pool at 11am.  You think I'm drinking margaritas and reading my favorite magazine?  Try digging to the bottom of the crumb filled, sunscreened slimy pool bag for that THIRD pair of goggles that are amazingly too tight and too loose all at the same time and then results in an epic throw down of wills and ultimately ends with the goggles being launched into the pool which you will inevitably have to retrieve, even though you didn't want to get your hair wet, because your 5 year old can't dive yet.  Give me your conference call and you can have lifeguard duty any day.

Even with all that, summer is still one of my favorite times of the year.  I like not having to wear 300 layers just to walk outside.  Or stress about whether or not my kid has shoes on when we leave the house (this happens often).

So if you're feeling the slump, the lack of motivation, the leave mommy alone I'm in the closet eating all of your fruit snacks, then let me give you some real tips to fight that. 

• Create a routine.  If the outside world isn't going to be kind enough to give us one over the summer, then we must create our own.  When I don't have a plan for the day I find myself saying "put down those scissors!" a lot more than one should have to say to herself or her child in a 24 hr period.  I am involved with several play groups and each week I can look at the activities happening around the area and plan something for us to do each day.  It gets us out of the house, gives us somewhere to be at a certain time and helps kindergartner A and I see other faces than just our own. Lifesaver.

• Meal plan.  I just heard your collective groan.  I know.  Planning meals involves dedicated time to researching recipes and writing down ingredients and then of all things actually having to make said meal.  Believe me, I know its horrible.  But it's better than the alternative.  5pm rolls around and you throw a hamburger bun and some peanut butter at your kid and hope they don't choke while you devour what's left of the plain spaghetti noodles you worked up the power to boil yesterday.  Meal planning will allow you to try fun new healthy summery recipes and YES if you're brave, you get bonus points for asking your kid to help.   I use a lovely little website called Plan To Eat (no they aren't paying me to say this)  It lets you share recipes with friends or pull recipes anywhere from the web, put them on the calendar when you want it and then takes all the ingredients from the recipe and organizes it into a shopping list.  It costs a couple dollars a month but I'm willing to pay that to make meal planning less of a chore.  Check it out http://www.plantoeat.com 

•  15 Minute Cleanup. I ingeniously invented this little nugget just recently.  Truth be told, I could leave for the hospital to have this baby any minute, ANY MINUTE! Maybe if I yell, she'll hear me and actually come out.  The thought of coming home to clutter and mess and dirt after a blissful stay in the gloriousness of a hospital room makes me a little insane.  Every night after dinner, the one that I carefully planned, all three of us participate in a 15 minute clean up.  Yes, I actually set a timer.  Kindergartner A is always in charge of her playroom and bedroom. Husband R and I triage the damage and tackle the worst of the mess.  Usually it's vacuuming and mopping...we have two dogs...and cleaning up the kitchen.  You'll be surprised what you can get done in 15 minutes when everyone chips in.  And the next day you get to wake up to a semi-clean home.

•  Drink enough water. This may seem small in comparison to these other tips but will probably have the biggest effect on the way you feel, physically and emotionally.  It's hot.  You need water now more than any time.  Make sure you're drinking at least half your body weight in ounces of water each day.  For a 150 lb person, that's 75 oz.  If you're growing a human, that amount increases with each lb gained.  No, I will not tell you how many ounces I'm having to drink these days.  Trust me, it will go a long way in fighting that slumpy feeling. 

And there you have it, four little ways to keep yourself from losing control and your mind this summer.  I might add, don't forget to have fun.  Summer time is short and our kids are only kids for so long.  Fight the urge to catch up on your shows and your ice cream and actually sit down and color with your child.  For like 10 minutes.  Only super heroes could handle anything longer.

How are you saying no to the summer slump?  I'd love to hear your ideas!!

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36 weeks and Hangry

This could also translate into...pregnant: feed me or I'll Cut You!

Seriously people...I could eat all day long, whatever I wanted and still be hungry.  It's like there's a tiny human inside of me consuming all of my food.  Oh..wait.

And now is not the time to be conscious of how much I'm eating.  Or is it?

Did you know that a pregnant woman only needs to consume an extra 300 calories a day?  That's like one snack.

So where do we get this "you're eating for two"?

Because it actually feels like I could eat my dinner, my husband's and probably even the kid's.   I'm blaming the hormones.

It really all comes down to making the right choices. And that's true no matter who you are, pregnant or not. Quality of food is way more important than quantity.

Bad choice...eating pizza for lunch and dinner because you ordered more food than you and your 5 year old could eat at one sitting.  Hey, she looked really hungry.  I may or may not have also had ice cream for dessert.  And...confession....I had a diet pepsi, ack!!!  I haven't had a soda in 2 years.  It's the hormones, it HAS to be the hormones. Sorry baby #2, (could we come up with a name already).  Your sister didn't get even a quarter of the nutrition you're getting and she seems to be okay...verdict is still out.

But I'm paying for it today, I'm tired, unmotivated and just want to eat more junk.  Now is a more important time than any for me to stay healthy.  I am actually eating for two.  Not calories.  But nutritionally.  

Processed, standard American diet on the left in 2010 and unprocessed, whole foods, nutritional program on the right, taken today.

Do I still feel as large as a house, absolutely!    Looking at these pictures can I tell a difference, totally.

Pregnancy is not the time to cut back on calories or try to lose weight but it's also not the time to eat whatever I want.  Just don't tell that to my hangry side...you might lose an eye.

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How You Do One Thing

We all go through seasons.  I want to tell you about my seasons.  There's the season of giving up coffee, then drinking it again and making up for every cup I gave up.   There's this lovely season I'm in now of raising an almost 5 year old while growing another human.  Exhausting and exhilarating all at once.  And that season will change again once baby girl is born.  Then I'm in the season of being mama to TWO kids.  Mother's of more than one, you are saints.  There's also the season of keeping the house clean and staying ahead of the laundry and...wait, that's never a season. 

But then there is the season of writing.  Do you know that last year I wrote to you lovely people every month for a year?   And then, the wind blew, Husband R sneezed in my direction and this mama became pregnant with daughter numero dos.  And writing...it got buried in all the sickness and exhaustion and trying to stay afloat just enough to enjoy the holidays.  But I'm back.  Really.  And when the baby is born and I stop writing..call me out on it, for real.

All that, it's natural, things we go in and out of as life changes.  But there's one thing, just one, that's not okay to start, then stop, then start again.  And I'm ever so guilty of it.  It's my quiet time and prayer time.   Life gets busy and just like my writing, I lose my motivation and forget it's importance.

So lately, I'm not willing to do much of anything. And I have lots to do.  The nursery isn't finished, not by far.  I am working part time at church while simultaneously building my own business.  I have a rising kindergartner...sniff...and husband to care for.  I'm focusing on being as healthy as I can through this pregnancy and practicing the wonder of natural childbirth.  Yes, you can practice, don't ask.  And it's easy for me to say "oh, I'm just hormonal." Or, "I deserve to lay in bed all day, I'm pregnant!"  While those statements may carry some weight, they aren't the whole truth.  The further away I get from dedicated, intentional time spent with God, the less effective every other area of my life becomes.  I've been hearing this quote a lot lately

"How you do one thing is how you do everything."

And it seems so simple because it is.  That one thing, studying his word, spending time in conversation with him, putting him first, how I do that translates to how I do everything else.

 Let that sink in. If something seems off, take a step back.  How are you doing with that one thing?  It could be the reason everything else seems off too.

This silly notion of time spent with God being a season, I'm trashing it.  It's not one of my seasons anymore. I'm committing the first thing I do in the morning to him.  Whether that's walking or sitting with my cup of coffee or putting in my headphones and tuning out the noise.

And writing, well I'm back at that too.  And I've got so much to share with you, knowledge to drop, but you'll have to stay tuned for another post.  That I promise I'll write...I think.

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